My name is Cassie...

Just when you thought the Snuggie was where it’s at…it’s the Hoodie-Footie Snuggle Suit! And it’s only $50! “Get ripped off, while looking like an idiot!” and “Trade comfort for friends and family!” are just a few slogans I immediately thought of.

It’d be one thing if it was marketed toward kids. Even sorta cute as some sort of bunny costume for adults. “Just add ears!” But this just got real. “For women who have lots of cats and like to stay home on weekends reading non-fiction!” Thank God for thumb holes to keep half your hands toasty warm. And where’s my free book light?!

And, you’ll be happy to know it comes with the 100% No Sex Guarantee: “We guarantee, you will never have sex while wearing this suit, or your money back!” The next best thing to a headache.

I know. Unreal.